what the hell am i supposed to do now? i feel like im never going to be happy. what if im not the successful woman ive always planned on being? what if i set my standards to high? what if growing up isnt all that its cut out to be? i really dont know how to do this on my own. i keep thinking, i think so much that sometimes i forget how to breathe or how to swallow or how to blink. i think so much that sometimes i dont even know what im thinking anymore. i just wish there was more i could do. i hate my self so much right now. i dont even know what i want to do with my life, i do want to be an engineer but the more my parents talk about it and build a life for me around it, the more i want to do something else. i dont know why but what if engineering isnt right for me? what if im not good at it? idkk i just want to get married have children and live overseas. fuck it.
(via lovedrugged)
